Asshole
by Charlie Baytes
Summary: You aren't an asshole, you're just trying so hard to be one. One-shot- will be edited upon finishing of actual series.


Okay so this is my first office fic. and it is of the marvelous Ryan Howard. It has no actual plot but I would love it if some reviewed. It's really short and once again makes no sense. Also I'll probably come back and edit it once I actually finish the series, but I just couldn't wait so yeah...

afdsljfdj. Review.

* * *

You and Kelly went to go see a movie one time, the Social Network to be exact, and it turns out, it was a really good movie. Although you're sure that most of it just flew over Kelly's head.

Towards the end of the movie, one of the characters turns to a lonely Mark Zuckerberg and says, "You aren't an asshole, you're just trying so hard to be." And for some reason that line really stuck with you, for reasons completely unknown to you.

_You aren't an asshole; you're just trying so hard to be one._

* * *

You've been called a lot of things.

Hired guy, Wunderkid, Temp, Fire guy, Asshole, douchebag.

Whatever. You've stopped caring about what people call you behind your back for a long time now.

* * *

Maybe it was all the days you spent sitting in a trash can or with your underwear up your butt from a particularly hurtful wedgie that made you not care anymore.

Because middle school's a bitch for a nice kid like you were and if you had ever dreamed of making it to high school you were going to have to toughen up and become a different Ryan. And if becoming an asshole that only looked out for himself was the answer, the magical secret, then that was what you were going to do.

Because as much as people would never believe you, you were once a nice kid who believed that every person was good at heart.

In other words, you were naïve.

* * *

Kelly is talkative and crazy and an attention-seeking whore but she's tough and funny and knows how to laugh at herself and get what she wants, so you respect her and like hanging out with her. She's pretty and curvy and totally in love with you, which is awesome because that means she'll do anything for you. Her eyes crinkle like ocean ripples when she laughs and she throws back her head sometimes making all her thick black hair whip around her face like an enchanting velvety curtain.

Kelly is mysterious.

Pam is cute and just as funny as Kelly, but she's kind of a bitch. She looks out for everyone in the office first, and she's tries to see the best in people. Tried to see the best in you. She has frizzy hair that you thought was kind of cute but never said a word. She's a Scranton seven but a New York six. She smells like lilac and laughs like spring. You can make her smile sometimes and when she does she looks down just for a second before looking back up and biting her bottom lip. She's shy but flirtatious.

Pam is upfront.

Erin is adorable and cute and really nice but she's also easily angered and kind of innocent so you could see why Andy would like her so much. She enjoys almost everything that Michael enjoys because she likes Michael in all the ways you never did. She sees him as a father and a mentor and a friend and you see him as a potential client, a puppet, or a little puppy. But she does these things sometimes, little goofy and quirky things that make her so, different. Incredible. She's cute and she makes you smile unconditionally. Maybe it's because of her ability to smile and like everything, to make the best of every situation. Or the way she's so fiercely loyal to Michael or whoever she deems fit to be loyal to. Or maybe it's her naïve nature that makes her so innocent and fun loving.

Erin is kind.

* * *

Michael once listed all your qualities, the good and bad.

You're selfish, image-obsessed, lazy, and a bad friend. But you shoot high, are goal-oriented, and can do whatever you put your mind to.

You never believed in yourself nor had anyone believe in you seriously. So maybe Michael isn't so bad after all.

* * *

You are Ryan.

Lazy. Goal-oriented. High shooter. Selfish.

That's all you are. That's all you ever will be.


End file.
